Posted in Uncategorized

Goodbye 2k18.

Oh yeah! It’s New Year’s Eve, right?

Nope. Wrong.

More like…OMG IS IT NEW YEAR’S EVE SO SOON???!!!

And its probably 2019 already in the East.

OH MY.

TIME. JUST. FLIES.

Lol but however, this time, I’m drilled with a blend of optimism and frenzy. I’m ready to move, to work harder and to celebrate life. I’m ready to leave this year, behind. And I can’t feel happier, saying this.🙂

But before I go, here’s a word to 2018. After all, we spent an entire 365 days with it, didnt we?

Dear 2018,

I can sense myself going through a multitude of emotions during the split second it took, while I addressed you as ‘dear’.

I’m sorry, but upon further consideration, I don’t think you are dear to me. You will never be. But that doesn’t mean I despise you either. You did give me showers of elation too. And they’re ones I’ll never be able to forget.

I don’t know. It’s always a case of me holding my breath, whenever I think of you. There are no proper thoughts or rather, words, that I can categorise you under. I still can’t seem to be able to judge you. You’re a plethora of colours to me. Shades of not just grey, but of vibrant greens, blues and violets too. On the whole, let’s call you the “Year of Extremities”.

There have been days just too bad, with a thick canopy of clouds towering over my head, not letting me have even a glimpse of light through the gaps. There have been weeks when I’ve drifted to sleep with tear-stained cheeks, every night. There have been days I’ve screamed silently into my pillow, which has grown to be my best friend, trying to muffle the cries.

Nevertheless, you let those storms bloom their way into a few inexplicable joys too. Joys that made me cry out loud with happiness…, the nights I couldn’t drift off, because I didnt want the day to end. The days I would whip out my phone to record everything around me, because I wanted to capture the moment in its essence and make it last forever.

So there were good times too. Fantastic ones. And yes, I’m not robbing the credit that you deserve.

I’m not romanticising here. You, of all people, should know that. These words are as precise as my breath.

All in all it’s been remarkable. Not good. Not at all easy. But rather, remarkable. I guess it’s been the most eventful year of my life.

From the GCSEs to an amazing summer holiday abroad, a huge Year 11 Farewell Party at the Ritz, to weekend dinners at the Hilton and mega-huge dance recitals, this year has certainly made itself unforgettable.

It’s also the year I’ve started Sixth Form, choosing subjects that would later decide my college and thereby my career options. And ofcourse it’s also the year I became 16 years old. 🙂

Getting emotional here, are we? NOT. 🙂

2018 also saw me turning into a people-hater. I started dreading every minute of school, the place I’ve spent more than half of my life in. My grades dropped, confidence dipped and character faltered. But?

But those times made me savour every good moment there was, with a fiery passion. I savoured it like it was the very last. And on the whole, I’m not the person I was, a year ago.

I’ve changed. Things have changed too. I guess change is constant, and probably now is when I’m actually noticing it. Or probably this time, the change I’ve gone through is starkly visible, unlike earlier, when I would feel all blank, wondering what happened when. But this time, it’s all too clear.

Reaching the last few hours of the year, aren’t we? Its New Year’s eve. And before we bid the final goodbye, I want you to know this, 2018.

Like everyone on this planet, I’m hoping for a better year. A year full of prosperity and happiness, and growth. But there are no promises now, is there?

Whatever may happen, whether things change, or continue with more challenges, I’m ready. I’m ready to show the strength that you nurtured within me, 2018. You showed me that, each day anything can happen, but it is within us to make them happen our way.

Adios.

Me.🙂

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Posted in Life's Worth It, Reblogs

Self Love, More than Anything💕 #projectlightshine

Project Light Shine is this blog project started by the lovely Gayle, which, as you’ll see, focuses on “Why Self-Love is the Most Important of All”

In this nuclear world full of hypocrisy, I’ll tell you, that self-love is the first beacon of light you can ever shine upon yourself, before starting on to spread your light on this world. Things aren’t always a cakewalk, and we aren’t steel machines either, to be always driven mechanically.

We have a heart that needs some support too. Does that mean you rely on others, hoping you’ll find the right person and one day they’ll support you? No. Never.

You never give anyone the power to change/destroy you. You put the power in your hands. You need love? Then love yourself. You need support? Then support yourself by all means. You are for you. No one can be there for you, better than you can.

And there are a hundred others who need to understand this too. They need you to shine the light.
Which is why I’m going to ask you this. Do spread the love. It means a lot and much more.🙂💕

Thaanks!!
Xxx
Brin.

love her savvy

Hey, you! Yes, you.Have you remembered to smile today?

If not, give me your biggest brightest smile, before you start reading.

Do it. I’m smiling at you. :-)) Smile back! Pretty please? 😊 Lovely.

Today I’m not writing to an audience. I’m writing this for you. Only you. And I want you listen to me very carefully.

Did you know how pretty and beautiful you looked when you smiled just now? I bet you didn’t. Well do it again and know for yourself. Look at that. Everybody needs to see that sunshine more often.

I bet you never tell yourself you’re pretty, too. You don’t, right? Well, I didn’t too. Didn’t. And I kept thinking I was never pretty. Like you.

Tell yourself you’re breathtakingly pretty. Say “Hello, Beautiful!!” whenever you look at yourself in the mirror. Tell yourself you’re the most delightful…

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Posted in Life's Worth It, Something I'd like to Talk About

Here’s to a New Beginning💫

Hiya everybody and WELCOME BACK to my blog.

As of today, I haven’t been blogging, for about 4 months now. Its a whooping gap, which has raced by unintentionally. Meaning: I didn’t really plan to take a break from blogging, neither did I do it because of any sort of ilness.

I did it, because things got out of hand. Bloody. out. of. hand. Too many things happened. I can’t really call all of them bad, but most of them were life-changingly terrible.

It was and sort of still is, one of the worst phases of my life.

Today, on my way from school, I felt freakishly sick. It didn’t even come as much of a surprise. I have been feeling mentally ill for quite a while, which I obviously haven’t revealed to anyone. I haven’t been able to sleep, eat or work properly, and every moment seemed to make the rest of my day worse. I felt hungry and tired, but I couldn’t eat anything. I felt ill, but couldn’t rest. I felt anxious and scared and low. But I couldn’t work on myself, or anything else. I felt trapped, guilty and mad, all at once.

And the worst part of it all? I couldn’t even force myself to take care of myself, because I’m in a mega huge time crisis.

Every evening of the week seems to be stuffed with homework, assignments and test prep, and my dance lessons eat up my weekends. I have horrible shadows under my eyes.

I am not able to cope. I want to . But I feel horribly tired all the time, and it just makes things worse.

Things seem to be going invariably wrong no matter what. It’s bloody annoying and at the same time I’m getting extremely fed up. Sixth form is horrible. I feel really paranoid most of the time, wondering what else could go wrong, and in the end they somehow do keep going wrong.

Again coping up would have been far easier were I in an atmosphere full of my friends. But my best friends and I have chosen different subjects for AS and A levels, and are in different blocks. So we only meet during breaks. (Which is probably the only reason I survive school.)

Although I have friends in my class, it still feels a bit lonely. You don’t really get anyone to gossip with, in class. Or someone to give a support when the teachers picks up on you.

But, lets say I’m sorttt of…getting used to it? At first it was insane. But now I have lots of people to talk to all the time, and it’s better. Its pretty brilliant on the outside. I’m the happy girl who laughs all the time, is fitter than the others, pretty chill, confident, the one with loads of friends and who understands everything in class.

But internally I’m screaming. Especially now. People have no idea how lonely I feel. How insecure and desperate I am. I feel horrible to say this out loud and if I post this, many people will read it. Its maddening.

But guess what? I have to do this. My blog is my place. It has helped me get a grip in this crazy world.

And anyone who says “blogging equals wasting time” is going to see me go savage. It’s what I thought a while before. That maybe I should spend less time on the internet, and more time on the other “important work”. Shucks to that. I’ve had more than enough of such hogwash.

I don’t know how many of you will be reading this. I love all my blogging friends and readers, to an extent I can’t possibly even express. Truly. ❤ There have been times where you were my greatest support, for which I’ll be forever grateful.

But I’m not sure how many of you were meant for the long term. To be honest, I was scared. My writing feels crap. I am scared.

I suppose, not many of you would be reading this. People have gotten over. I simply couldn’t bring myself to it, and I procrastinated. I procrastinated for about 5 months, can you believe that?

And then finally it dawned on me. After all, its me. I can’t run away from myself, or my blog, which is MINE. Whether people respond or not, its me and I am not changing that. People must have told me this quite a number of times. But this time, it is quite sinking deep within me.

I have loads to talk about, reasons to give, and promises to make. But it’s not going to make much difference now, is it? 🙂

~~~ Throughout this post, with each word I typed, I felt a multitude of emotions within me. It feels strangely okay, but scary too.

Maybe I feel lonely sometimes. It’s okay. Many people face that and to be honest, I’m not really alone.

Maybe I feel scared. But I’m bold where I want to be. And maybe I have messed up. But I’m not giving up.

I have both highs and lows. It’s what makes me human. I guess, the mistake I made here is that, I tried to be the perfect glam girl all the time.

It was all well for about a month or two. But as time passed and obstacles struck, I felt doomed. I thought I’ve lost myself for good, because perfect girls don’t have bad weeks and bad months on roll, do they? They don’t lose, or feel this tired. They don’t get obsessed with toxic friendships. Right?

Well, know what? Sometimes they do too.Everyone does. That’s how we learn.

I’ve learnt that. We face different sort of problems throughout life. And these few mad months, have taught me this.

Trying to be perfect isn’t what makes you thrive. Accepting the ground reality is what lifts you up. And the reality is that, you’re amazing. Not flawlessly perfect. But dead amazing. So through the storm, believe in yourself, suck a deep breath and just do it. 💫

Xxxx

Me❤

P.S. I MISSED THIS SO FREAKING MUCHHH XX

Posted in Annocements, Awards and Tags, Uncategorized

Let’s Talk on Twitter!

Hiya everybody!

Recently, probably sometime around April, (I cant remember when exactly. Anyway that’s not the point) I lost my Twitter account.

I know right?! It freaked me out completely because I was quite active there, and my account was fairly big, with the tweets and followers. And I had worked to get there.

All the launch ups, chats and groups I was involved in, all GONE. Bam. Vanished. And my Twitter friends? I’ve missed them A LOT.

I tried soo hard to unlock it. I used all my email addresses and I even reported.

But well, as you can probably tell, it didn’t work. And it felt maddening. People were probably still tagging me/ texting me/ wondering why this girl suddenly ran off and how mean she is and how dare she not reply for months. But? Honestly I couldn’t have tried more.

And the very last thing I wanted was to start a new account and get frustrated every time I open it. So I just left it for then and moved on. Till now. When I thought I should maybe, probably, really come back?

(Agh I’m sorry my English sounds crap😂 but I haven’t been writing for such a long time! *hits head*)

So that’s my Twitter Story!!

And I’ve missed you guys a lot, so do follow me back!! I can’t wait to get in touch. And for the others who didn’t follow me before, just click the link and you’ll be there.

Click this to Follow me and I’ll Reach you back💕

Also do post your Twitter IDs and links in the comments below!! I’ll reach you through that. There will be lots coming up so dont miss the fun!

Ciao!!

Xxx

Posted in Reblogs, Uncategorized

My Thoughts on the Education System | Collab with Debbie!

A change in the modern education system is something I’ve always advocated for. As a student, it is we who have first hand experience with the inner dealings of the current system and how really terrible the pressure is, and how it jeopardizes and thrashed down our inner creativity and imagination
Intelligence seems to be measured by memory power and there can’t be something stupider than that. There are kids who slave every day memorizing and never spend any time trying to actually like or understand what they are doing.
This is a beautiful piece by my dearest friend Elm and everything she says is 100% true because I’m kind of experiencing it all ditto. Ugh. But I’ll never ever stop voicing out even if it takes a 100 years for this to change.

Posted in Teenage

Exams Done = Summer is HERE 🏖❤

Just as I handed over my Physics paper, I looked around and saw everyone grinning around, making mad faces and sinking into their chairs with enormous sighs. Others made high-five gestures in the air and soon there’s was HUGE hubbub of chatter, and happy cries.

The day before yesterday was the last day of my exams- the grand and pompous GCSEs. AAAHH I. CANNOT. BELIEVE. THEY’RE. OVER.

What?!

After an exhausting month of revision, notes, refreshers, and whatnot, I’m finally free. My mind is in a whirlwind of what comes next. At first I could hardly process. Just as the bell rang, my brains immediately wracked themselves, trying to remember the next exam so as to plan revision.

I’m practically screaming and dancing and already feeling quite delirious. The day was fantastic, although there were a couple of mishaps. For one, I lost my Twitter account. WTF?!

I know I know. It’s madly infuriating. 😭 *sobs loudly*

I am locked out of Twitter. I tried every way possible to unlock it, but it seems I am apparently “too young” for Twitter. *curses under breath*

I’ll be starting a new account sometime later, because I’m still not over it. Anyway, that’s for later.

Combing back, my mind is in a highly hyper active mood, at the mo! All forms of tiredness and negativity seem to have disappeared. I couldn’t care less about anything other than summer. It’s highly contagious. Whether I have made proper plans or not is a whole other issue. Summer makes me mad, no matter in what form it comes.

Although on one side I am crazily ecstatic, on the other, I feel a bit blank. And terribly tired. They’re over. I did my Standard Grades. Year 11 is done. What. No. So soon? That’s all? Is it SIXTH FORM already? I am growing old. Whaaatt?! No! I want to watch Noddy back again.😭

But well, I decided to put the thoughts aside for later, and had the best form of fun with my friends. Plunging into the ‘present’ was fab.

My friends and I went for celebratory burgers nearby and since most of the kids there were from school, it kind of became a full fledged party.

It was SOO much fun. See the kind of magic here? Everyone was dead tired from revising day and night, and sitting for exams hours together, but still there was so much dancing, singing and fun. And still everyone was at their happiest. ( Oh and let’s not forget the cake and food that was also a reason for the delight😂).

We took TONS of photos on every phone possible because it was our last time together at the same school, before we move out to different schools for college or sixth form. Then came the last dance, and we cried. There were hugs and tearful goodbyes, and it was highly heart-wrenching and emotional. But still the day gave me so much hope- something that said that, we being SO close together would never truly grow apart that easily. That we would always meet up and catch up with gossips and fun like we always do. ☺❤

It was definitely a lovely day. I came home with blissful thoughts later in the evening and only then properly noticed my room.

Boy, it was the biggest mess of paper and stationary. I wouldn’t have been surprised if someone mistook it for a waste paper mart. There were revision material scattered almost everywhere, a bunch of books and notes stacked in the corner and papers peaking out. Pens were everywhere, and rough sheets flew across the room, when I switched on the air-con.

Obviously, like anyone, I didn’t clean it up at once, or even now yet.😂

I slept like a corpse after dinner, and woke up a bit late. I honestly couldn’t move. But I did jump out of bed later on, because SUMMER IS HERE!!!!

I quickly started going through my long-comprehensed summer plans and I am basically bubbling with joy. Since I missed out on blogging last summer, I’ve made my mind to definitely make the most of it this time.

My plans?

  • I’m going on a holiday to Delhi, the capital of India, and to Barcelona, Spain. It’ll be absolutely fantastic, because the places are quite tropical and I shall also be seeing one of the Wonders of the World. *gobsmacked*.

I will post a lot of pictures as I tour. 😊 I still badly wanted to go to Amsterdam this year, but sadly it didn’t work out. But 2 trips here already and I can’t help dreaming about beaches.

  • And then my cousin is getting engaged this July, so there will be TONS of wedding shopping, planning, organising and meeting up! She’s lovely, and I can’t help feeling extremely happy over all this.
  • There will be my usual dance lessons and practice, books, hang out sessions with friends, and shopping!

Whatever issues I had and faced, I’ve definitely thrown them to the back of my mind. Bloody hell, I can’t stop going into a deep state of euphoria, now. ❤

Summer is here and it is jam-packed with exciting plans and fun. God, who doesn’t LOVE summer?!😃🏖❤

How about you? Are your exams done? Summer plans? Any trips abroad?

Posted in Awards and Tags

The Real Neat Blogger Award

But right now I am setting out to get them all done and profusely thank all my AMAZING blogging friends who have nominated me, because these awards have made me SO SO HAPPY AAAHH. And I promise I will get them done no matter what. 😁 So if you ever wish to nominate me as someone deserving, please don’t hesitate because I certainly don’t want to be that ungrateful-cow-who-doesn’t-deserve-anything-because-she’s-lazy-and-she-procrastinates. Whoops! 😅😁
And here’s a HUGE THANK YOU to the lovely Zovi for nominating me for the Real-Neat Blogger Award! Please do check her out. She’s writes lovelyy poems.😊

The Rules :

1. Publish this on your blog by answering all the questions.

2. Put up that award logo over that post.

3. Thank the person who nominated you and also thank the person who made this award.

4. Nominate bloggers and ask them your own set of questions.

Here are My Answers!

  • What get’s you through a bad day (or everyday)?

Books? Definitely.
And sometimes(mostly) it’s my phone because I either let it out to someone or type out all the rubbish into a WP Draft.
You should try! It helps. ☺

  • One word that describes the relationship between you and your blog.

My Utopia? Honestly I can’t brainstorm further.
My blog means so much to me- it makes me happy, annoyed, bored, frustrated, satisfied, excited and whatnot! But its MY BLOG. Its a huge realationship. Sometimes I’ve felt the pressure too. But I’m sure I’ll never give it up. 😊

  • Does writing energize or exhaust you?

Both. Meaning, it energizes me most of the time because I get the urge to write more and more. But once I get it all out, it kind of makes me want to lie down. I think that’s because it relaxes me enough to put me to a peaceful sleep

  • Do you think someone could be a writer if they don’t feel emotions strongly?

Ofcourse they can. Maybe they wouldn’t write YA, fiction, poems etc. But maybe they can write Textbooks or Scientific journals or research papers, or even Sci-fi novels?
Honestly, I’m no judge of what anyone can or cannot become. And nor is anyone.
But tbh, writing isn’t just completely all about feeling deep and emotional because I for one, am not a hugely emotional person.

  • Which is your favorite post from my blog?

The last one! It’s a poem called Happily Ever After. I’ve read your other posts too, and loved them, but the last one is my current and recent favourite and I simply CAN’T get it out of my mind. 😄😊

Here are My Nominees!!:

  1. Gracie Chick
  2. Chiri and Dochi
  3. Girl Illustrated
  4. Gayle
  5. Elena
  6. Pensivity101
  7. Mandibelle

And Here are Your Questions:

  • What hobby and career would you get into, if time and money weren’t the issue?
  • What was your idea of/about blogging before you started? Has it changed? How?
  • What state or country would you never want to visit? Why?
  • What takes up too much of your time?
  • What TV show or movie do you mostly skip or refuse to watch?

So there it goes! And if you aren’t nominated please free feel to do this award and you won’t find a person happier than I would be!

So what are your answers? Feel free to comment them below!!

Me ❤

Posted in Life's Worth It, Something I'd like to Talk About, Teenage

Let’s Do with a Story 

So, I had to babysit a group of primary kids a week ago, and I had to read them a book everyday. I got pretty bored soon, so I started making up stories on my own.

And here’s one, not just for kids, but for every damn person on earth. Especially for schoolers of all age. I hope you take in the underlying theme, because with that in mind, we can all together be unique in an exceptional way. 🙂

Mrs.Fox was happy.

With gleaming eyes and boundless faith, she hoped that her newly opened school would be a flying success. There were more than 100 admissions, and just a couple more weeks to go.

She was determined to make it the best school in the entire Jungle and introduced everything in the curriculum – reading, writing, arithmetic, swimming, dancing, running, climbing trees etc. and insisted that the teachers should take classes regularly and test the students periodically. Students would be made to compete on all grounds and be awarded with Merit Certificates and medals.

Classes started. Students were advised to take notes in class, memorize every lesson sincerely, and do homework daily. And exams were scheduled too.

However, as weeks passed by, the teachers were extremely unsatisfied with the results.

However much they ever tried, they couldn’t teach the Lion to swim, the fish to run and the tiger, to even hold a pencil!

The crow refused to sing and the fox could never fly.

The teachers tried all the methods and regularly conducted extra classes, special classes on Sundays and drilled the students to the utmost. Results would be moderate on one day, and yet the next day they would be as bad as ever.

The teachers awarded regular punishments to the students, believing they would become a “little more sincere”.

The peacock would help the teacher conduct dancing classes but the pig would not get a single step correct.

Likewise the owl did not want to learn to read and the monkey could not swim.
All the students failed in the exams.

The jungle folks were very worried and the fox was in an abyss. The baby animals felt guilty, depressed and useless. They didn’t like school.

They had destroyed all hopes of Mrs. Fox and their parents. Probably they were useless and undeserving. They hated the neighbours’ comments and their mums looking sad.

But every rain blooms flowers. The wise owl then told a brilliant plan to Mrs.Fox.

Let the students take up the class they want to and then conduct the exam. The monkey did not have to learn swimming anymore, but the crocodile could practice swimming and diving.

The crow could fly and learn to do somersaults in the air and the squirrel could continue learning to crack nuts. The birds could sing and the turtles didn’t have to climb trees.

School became a lovely place where everyone could do what they wished, where interests and passion were developed till the students mastered them, and there was no more “stress”.
The ducks swam all day and the peacocks danced all week.

When the exams were conducted, all the students passed with flying colours.

The animals weren’t “bad” and dunce at everything. They were just masters in a certain thing.

And so are you.

So the next time you don’t feel your heart leaping with joy, as you work out Chemistry, keep it away for once. Show them. Prove them that a pioneer in dance, music, arts or language, doesn’t have to work out formulae and decipher quantum theories, and vice versa.

Me❤

P.S. I’m so sorry for being so quiet for such a long time!! (In case you didn’t notice my absence, never mind.😂) I’ve got so many posts in draft, but I couldn’t just post them. And the blogosphere seems super quiet suddenly and it’s deafening. I hope I fully reconnect soon! XX